I’m glad I’m over the phase when I let my pimple decide my plans. Acne was a loyal, unwanted companion throughout my growing-up years. There weren’t too many extreme cases, but like every teenage girl, I hated the sight of frequent breakouts. My mother would sweetly tout the lone pimple on my face as a little beauty spot—I, on the other hand, couldn't wait to destroy it. I scrubbed, rubbed and popped the hell out of it, not caring about its scarring repercussions. Slowly, its occurrence reduced, but the loyalty remained as the pimple came back in all its bubbling glory in my twenties, albeit random and infrequent. By then I knew not to touch it, pop it or try to scrape it off. But I still wanted it gone, ASAP. So I’d concoct homemade masks and apply and reapply ointments, obsessing over the zit’s size and shape every waking hour. I’d frantically call my dermat when I needed it gone before an important event. If the zit stayed, I stayed in too. But slowly, things started to change, and I realised it had a lot to do with my thoughts.
Three years ago, the day we were about to celebrate a close friend’s new job over drinks and dinner, mister pesky (zit) decided to show up—making its appearance loud and clear at the most annoying spot on my face. I had three options: let the zit win and take a raincheck; react, rebel and emergency-dial my go-to skin clinic for desperate measures; or give it the cold shoulder, ignoring it while I revelled in my friend’s milestone. I decided it was time to not let the breakout break me, or come in the way of life, or in this case, love, because it just so happens, I met my partner for the first time that same night.
Subsequently, and gradually, the way I approached life changed. I became mindful of little things people often overlook. I read a lot. I started practising yoga, thanks to my mum, who, today, appreciates my nagging when she gets bogged down by everyday things and dismisses “self-time”. I realised how these changes did indeed reflect on my skin. Though my profession inevitably has me trying plenty of products and skin treatments, I am mindful about what I put on my skin and how often. I also realised that I cannot chase perfection, and accepted my pores, my uneven texture and a skincare routine that wasn’t a result of trends.
“Truly flawless skin does not exist, so to chase after it is likely both a waste of one’s time and money,” says Dr Anjali Mahto, a medical and cosmetic consultant dermatologist, and the author of The Skincare Bible, “Having suffered with acne since [the age of] 12, I’ve come to accept that my skin condition doesn’t define me,” she adds. The virtual world, full of augmented and filtered realities, tends to make you build unrealistic expectations from yourself, making it harder to accept who you are. “Skin has visible pores, lines, pigmentation and scars. I advise patients to monitor what content they’re consuming online and to remember that the vast majority of images in the media have also been photoshopped and are not accurate representations of skin in real life,” Dr Mahto adds. Your skin will have good and bad days, and you’ve got to love it in sickness and in health. Her personal journey with acne, too, had her thinking that if her skin got better, her life would improve. “My own self-worth was inextricably tied to my skin,” she says. A visit to a dermatologist helped subside the issue, but the acne did not end there. “I was later diagnosed with a condition called Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS), which itself is a cause of acne and oily skin, and my acne returned in my 20s,” she says. Now 42, and a consultant dermatologist, Dr Mahto understands that acne is, for her, a chronic condition which waxes and wanes, but she doesn't dare hope—even doing the job she does—that there will be a permanent “cure”. She empathises with patients with problematic skin and her aim is to catch it before it creates long-term physical damage in the form of scarring, or psychological damage due to deteriorating mental health. “I don’t want my patients to do what I did and waste time and money on products which won’t work if the acne is deep or inflammatory,” she says.
Strip back. Slow down. Keep it simple and don’t get sucked into trying the latest trends and products. “A lot of people are indulging in too much skincare when in reality, their routine could be stripped back to the essentials i.e. a cleanser, basic moisturiser, sunscreen and retinoid,” says Dr Mahto. Skin likes consistency and routine. If you’re unsure where to start, are suffering from a chronic skin condition or it is affecting your mental health and mood, seek advice from an expert for a personalised treatment and course. And love yourself a little more. “It’s not an easy habit to get into, but when you see yourself in the mirror and think negatively about how it looks/feels, try to acknowledge that feeling and be kind/gentle to yourself,” advises Dr Mahto. She also warns that if checking your skin is becoming an obsessive behaviour, it’s worth speaking to your GP to get help.
It’s crucial to realise that our skin is a true reflection of our inner wellbeing and how we feel. When I had a three-hour-long chat with aesthetician and certified access bars practitioner, Mala Punwani, whose passion and approach to beauty is slow and mindful, I also became conscious of the fact that our thoughts have a huge impact on our skin. If we’re caught up in negative thoughts, that agitated state of mind will nullify all that we do for our skin. “A peaceful mind absorbs everything better and is more receptive,” she said to me. Perhaps that’s why no product or treatment can beat a “back-from-holiday” glow—a clear reflection of our blissful statement of mind when we’re “out of office” and soaking up the sun on a tropical island.
Build healthy habits to reach that space in your head. Try to reflect on your thoughts and actions and understand where you could have avoided a reactive response. Make skincare a self-care ritual. Start your morning with meditation and spend time with nature instead of staring at your screen as soon as you wake up. Then splash your face with very cold water generously and gently pat it dry. Exercise consistently and include gut-healthy foods to your daily diet. Listen to your body and stick to a routine that works for you.
Today, in my thirties, my skin mostly behaves. While there are still some rare days that my inflamed skin affects my mood, for the most part, I’ve learned to let it be and feel completely “normal”. It doesn’t matter what age or phase of skin condition you’re going through, it’s important to respect and accept it, and not try too hard to change it. Embrace a holistic approach to beauty. If you wake up with a tiny or a massive zit, think of it as a temporary beauty spot, remember that it’s normal and let it run its course. Eat well, sleep enough, have happy thoughts and know that good-enough skin, is indeed good enough.